I need to vent. I’m kinda blue today. I’m trying not to be. I keep reading over Philippians 4:8 (message) but for some reason my heart is hard to it and it’s not sinking in...
“Summing it all up, friends, I’d say you’ll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious – the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse.”
I hate that I’m glum. It’s not praising to God to be this way. I’m struggling today. I’m frustrated and wondering why God has put such a huge desire in my heart but no way of bringing it to life (at least, not right now). It’s hard to sit in a cube for 8+ hours a day when the world outside is spinning with adventure. It’s hard to type words about IT products (boring!) when my hands want to draw and create. It’s hard to have my head full of colors and sounds and far-off places when I can’t set it all free. It’s hard to literally ache for wide-open spaces and be stuck at some corporate job in the city. I don’t understand it. I really need to humble myself and give it all to God. I need to trust that He has me in this very place for a reason. He’s so loving and so faithful and so wise…why is it so hard to trust that He’s got a plan? Why is it so hard for me to be obedient with where He’s put me and be patient?
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Favorite Quotes
“The only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn, like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars and in the middle you see the blue centerlight pop and everybody goes "Awww!” - Jack Kerouac
“We need to find God, and he cannot be found in noise and restlessness. God is the friend of silence. See how nature - trees, flowers, grass- grows in silence; see the stars, the moon and the sun, how they move in silence... We need silence to be able to touch souls." - Mother Teresa
“We need to find God, and he cannot be found in noise and restlessness. God is the friend of silence. See how nature - trees, flowers, grass- grows in silence; see the stars, the moon and the sun, how they move in silence... We need silence to be able to touch souls." - Mother Teresa
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